Kids are so disgusting. Now I knew this before becoming a parent and now being one I still see it as true. But pre-parent, I thought they would ALWAYS be messy. Now I don’t know if I just have a pretty clean child and I’m lucky or if I do a pretty good job just keeping her moderately clean but I don’t think she’s as messy as I thought she’d be. Yes we have days where she is just a nasty child from something she ate or rolled in, but still 80% of my days, she’s pretty clean.
Today was not one of those days.
My morning started with me going to the bathroom and of course Riley is in tow. Usually she spends time making sure all the clothes are in our laundry hamper, plays with the one open cabinet or playing in her baby tub. Nope. Today she decided she bring me her baby tub. I asked her to put it back (I was ignored). Next she starts bringing clothes OUT of our hamper and putting it in the tub. Why? I have no idea. I keep pleading to her from the toilet to just stop. I am just watching her pull clothes, smell socks, and other garments and tossing them in the bath tub. THEN next thing I know I see her grab a piece of Kix cereal off the bathroom floor. I don’t know when it got there or really where it was but she had it and popped it in her mouth. I was like “Noooo, Riley noooo, that is so yucky!!” and she promptly replies to me with a “mmmmm” sound and a smile. Well too late for that… Builds immunity right?
A couple hours later, my niece has to go to her school to pick up her class schedule. I figured, eh perfect to just go and let Riley run around before nap time. Little did I know this class schedule was going to take an hour and a half to do! But in the mean time, Riley was running around throwing sticks, showing me grass, the normal toddler things. Then over time she gets farther and farther away from me. Clearly she wasn’t gonna come back to my comfy spot under a tree so I joined her by one of the classrooms.
She started getting hungry so I have her some cheese fries (Thanks Julie, she’s addicted!). Soon I realize I have made a rookie mistake. Here I am giving her something cheesy and I have forgotten a pack of wipes for her bag. This is going get messy. I watch Riley as she starts to dip the fries into the dirt and eat it, I tell her no. Then she is like rolling them on the pavement and trying to eat it, I tell her no. I am watching as this continues and her hands and mouth are just becoming a dirty, cheesy mess.
Soon a pigeon lands near us and she starts chasing the creature around. Cute right? To keep the bird around I throw the bird a cheese fry. Riley saw me throw something and instinctively throws a stick at the bird hahaha!!
Finally Riley realizes that I’m throwing the cheese fries so she starts breaking pieces off for herself to throw. Kind of like half for me, half for the bird. Best buddies right there haha. Except sometimes she’d get too excited and would throw some fries, and the bird would fly away. Riley would run and get the fry and pop it into her mouth. I was like eh, whatever, its just grass. I used to eat grass when I was little and I’m fine.
Then here’s when it happened.
I started video taping Riley chasing the bird. To keep the bird around I took a fry and threw it at the bird. Stupidly, I didn’t break it into a small enough piece, another mistake. The bird went for the fry but when it couldn’t fit it all in it’s mouth and Riley began to chase it, the bird dropped the fry that was in it’s mouth and flew a few feet away. Riley then picked up the fry. I hoped she would throw the fry back at the bird but nope…She popped it in her mouth. (Be sure to check my Instagram @sharonholck to watch the video)
First the Bathroom Kix Cereal…Now sharing fries with pigeons mixed with dirt and other crap. At this point I scooped her up and decided snack time was over and to clean her off in a bathroom.
It is only 3pm and I’m honestly a little scared she’s going to find something else to gross me out just for kicks.
I mean while this is gross, it’s the worst she’s put in her mouth. She’s put a dead baby lizard and a head baby frog in her mouth before. She also found a dead spider in my show once and I’m sure that would’ve gone in her mouth too if I didn’t stop her.
What’s the weirdest things your kids have eaten?